FORGIVENESS...FAMILY...LOVE!!

At the end of the day, a loving family should find everything forgivable. In some families, please is described as the magic word.  In our house, however, it was sorry. Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.

This past weekend I met my cousin Juanita & my future brother-in-law Miguel, for the 1st time and saw my sister Andrea, whom I haven't seen in years because of a ridiculous lie. 

I've been taught to be angry, to yell, to scream, to get revenge, to hate, and so many other bad habits. Since my 30's...I'm learning to undo those bad habits & create positive ones in my life. My home life was unstable. But outside of that life made since. Outside of my home & family..I had friends & strangers that I could be more positive. People that I could inspire that would balance all of the negativity surrounding me. I could be that motivation that would spark the ripple of joy in someone's still river. It was so easy. But yet I couldn't be that ripple in my own river!?

I was so nervous before I got to my brother Mark's house because I wasn't sure of the outcome. I prepared for the worst? I would never tell anyone to do that though? I'd tell them to stop thinking like that & stay optimistic..prepare for the best outcome. Yet I couldn't find find the optimism in me? Thank God for Marshall! The love of my life. He is truly my angel! He is my optimism. He is my positive reinforcement. He is my inspiration. My spark of motivation. He YELLED me the whole time!..LOL!! He was the kick in the pants that I needed to cut the BS out!!  Poor Bridgette my sweet angel..tried!!  =) Bless her heart! =)

Now I hate to tell anyone they're right because I'm ALWAYS right but lately I've been very comfortable with not always having to be right & to respect other views. I trust his judgment & he was right! There was so much love & forgiveness & healing in that room that day that even as stubborn as I am...I immediately was at PEACE! I was healed. There was love & I enjoyed in it! I soaked it up with my very being! I realized that I am not always right & I need to learn to be more humble to forgive & to move ON! There is no progress no purpose with out forgiveness. The tears in my brother's & sister's eyes melted my cold hurt heart ...WARM. 

Thank God for pictures! lol..As I look at those pics from that day..my heart melts each time & I just want to hug & kiss my brother's & sisters & tell them..we are going t be just fine! I want to reflect the love that they give me! 

Marshall taught me that! Even in the storm just hold me & tell me everything will be just fine!! Do you see why I love that man so much??? Isn't he just delicious?! LOL!! He has just been such a wonderful blessing in my life. Without him, I don't think I would have gotten here!! 

I recently called Kendahl & Vern too. Sometime ago we got into a disagreement & instead of me working through it..I just let it go. Walking away was always so much more easier for me to do. But I missed them terrible & I would think about them often. & I realized "Fool your ego, stubbornness, and pride is going to cause you to end up alone & bitter & hurt!" 

People that mean the most to you are going to hurt you at times because THEY LOVE YOU & are trying to protect you! If they didn't love you, they wouldn't say anything! I get it now! 

Communication, humbleness, forgiveness, love, and an open heart..as well as an apology or two..HEALS THE PAIN! So I called them and apologized!  And soon with Kinu..we will be traveling..to see them! I can't wait! I just want to give them both a big hug & say I love you!

2011 has started off beautifully..praying the rest of this year will be the same if not better...& I'm positive it will be!! Growth..Possibility...Progress...Purpose!!!

 It's such a wonderful feeling. So in our household...LOVE is taught! Laughter is taught! HEALING is taught!! FAMILY is taught to stick together through good & bad times!!! Reassure each others safety & know that EVERYTHING WILL BE JUST FINE! WE ARE GOING TO MAKE IT! All Marshall ever wanted was to be happy..all I ever wanted was a family... HAPPY FAMILY..isn't that a great combination for life!

I know I'm not perfect. I know have many faults but I recognized them & I am correcting them & learning from them! I am seeing the life I've always wanted & I am grateful! I have a HUGE family & we love each other....& I'm grateful!!!! & I'm growing!! =)

Shout Outs to my Loves...

Marsh

Mark

Bri

Fe 

Dre

Nita

Miguel 

Kendahl

Vern

To my other family members..I love You & we will be just fine! I apologize for any pain I've caused you...and I forgive you for any pain you've caused me!!! 

Everyone else.....See You Soon!

Life..it's not easy...but it works!..LOL!!

Love Your Life, Your Family, & Yourselves....& Have A Golden Day Lovers!!!!!